I Must Do This

I HAVE to talk about the past like 11 hours because it was just so ridiculous. Then again, everything seems more funny when you're sleep deprived. ANYWAYS, okay, so last night I was reading up to around 330 am because I woke up at like 1 pm yesterday and I can't sleep straight if I hadn't been awake for at least 12 hours. (It's a wierd mindset but I can't help it) I was pretty awake but I tried to sleep anyways but then suddenly my room got really warm because the a/c had turned off :[[[ My fan doesn't work in my room so thennnnnn...


Approx. 4:45 am: decided to try sleeping in loft because the fan works there.
10 minutes later: Mom comes in and turns fan down, walks away. I kick blanket off as a hint to turn the fan back up. She comes back in and tries to cover me with a heavier blanket than I had >< (I was only using a throw blanket). I fully wake up and tell her its too hot while she's trying to turn down my phone because I kept getting tweets. Then she's like tryna start a conversation about why I'm gonna wake up so early blah blah blah, she leaves, I turn fan back up. 2 minutes later: Knock out. 7:30-ish am: Mom calls me from downstairs asking me about my doctors appointment, telling me to leave early, yadda yadda, things I already know. I've been to the doctor before ya know? Maybe because it's by myself? Even though I've gone by myself before? Or maybe she likes to torture me. I don't know. 8am: Alarm goes off. I honestly thought someone was calling me. Reality set in, I had to get ready. crap. 8:15 am: Dad gets home, I get ready. 8:30 am: "Tiff what time is your appointment?" "9:30" "okay" 8:54 am: "Are you leaving yet?" "In a little bit" 9 am: "Dad there's no co-pay right?" "No there shouldn't be" "Are you sure?" "Yeah if there is just tell them to send us the bill." "Okay" 9:10 am: I leave to doctor 9:24 am: I sign in at doctor's office waiting.. waiting.. waiting.. waiting.. 9:40 am: I'm called to fill out my papers. When I'm almost done the lady says, "okay it will be 15 dollars co-pay" "Um I was told I wouldn't have co-pay." "No with your insurance there is 15 dollar co-pay" "Umm... okay can you just send me the bill?" "No we have to have it before the appointment." We negotiate, blah blah, end up having to reschedule. Me:"That's wierd cause my dad came here and didn't have to pay anything." "No we have to have the co-pay." (I get it lady I was just saying ><) "Now If you're in too much pain, you can go right over to urgent care. But oh, they have the co-pay too." "Um no I didn't have co-pay, there I've been there before." "They don't need it up front." "Oh okay thanks anyways." I leave. Urgent care doesn't charge me anything, I never got any bill from there. The lady was confused? Maybe it was too early in the morning? I'm not complaining honestly, I'm just saying. What's up with that? So now I have to wait a month for my appointment :[ UGHHGHHHHHH! If the co-pay really is 15 bucks I'd rather just stay with my old doctor D: it costs the same :P THEN I drop off books at Mia's house ;] haha I waited awhile for her to open the door but I didn't mind. My brain was numb (still kinda is) so it was like whatever. Communication is hard when there's no way to directly contact the person....... ... ... ... I'm so tired. I was supposed to go job hunting today, but I don't think it'd make a good impression on potential employers if I show up looking all pale in the face and incoherent lol. This is such a long explanation of nothing hahaha oh deeeaaarrr >< ... Maybe this will just be how I explain it to bunny how I'm not a flake, I just am very incoherent and sleep deprived and my eyes are tired. How tired? When I put my contacts in, they burned quite a bit. When I was driving my right contact went slightly blurry because it went dry. So yes! I will text bunny the url to this. GENIUS! Hi Bunny :]

If you guys read this all the way through, I'm sorry for my pointless banter xD

**EDIT
I just realized my morning was quite pointless since I didn't get my appointment. UGH whatever sleep tiiiiiiime!

Insomnia

*sigh I got like 3 hours of sleep when I thought I was gonna knock out all night. Now I can't sleep so I might as well post those pictures. But only some, there's a lot. Shot by the lovely Darvie'Bunny

That should be the right order, the reason some are darker is because the sun was just rising and a lot of places were still really shaded. Hm yupp. My favorite part is the waterfall :D The ice still being frozen was insanely pretty!

Yesterday we had a little "indoor camping" at my house for cynthia's birthday. It was like, i don't know. Like it wasn't exciting but it wasn't that warm fuzzy feeling of bonding haha. Probably because I got irritated but whatever :[

My life other than that? Irritated/Frustrated like 24/7. Why? *sigh long story.

My brother went to California this weekend and when he came back he gave us these dvds my uncle made of my grandma's funeral. I watched it and yeah :[ I miss her.


What a sad way to end a post.

Wow

I honestly don't know why I'm updating right now cause I can't write out everything until I get my pictures :[ I took the pictures onto my flashdrive but I was so sleep deprived I guess I missed some D': I have a lot of cute pictures to show sooo yeah! :D

Just a taste lol More next time

Such A Long Weekend

Mkay I honestly don't really remember Friday, I just remember that the night before I stayed up really late skyping with bunny and trying to figure out my school stuff. Buuuut then I think I did lots of errands maybe? Then Saturday I woke up at 5, did yard work, came home practiced guitar and then was dragged off to the movies to see Super 8. Honestly it wasn't that great of a movie >< waste of money like ferreal. Then food at applebees, another waste of money. I started off with a dollar, gained 20, ended up with nada. Sunday I woke up kinda late, went to church, picked up Amanda and had a chill day with movies, popcorn, brownies, and coffee slushies :] I just dropped her home awhile ago and she left her movie so I can watch it, Gnomeo and Juliet x] It makes me want to read Romeo and Juliet So I was thinking while I was in church, would it be bad to read Dante's inferno in church? Cause that's what I've been reading but I wasn't sure if it'd be bad...? Ummmmm let's see, tomorrow I go to school to see the counselor with Bunny then go dress shopping and theeeenn sleepover at her house and Mt Charleston at dawn? Probably. Not much of an update but well, there ya go lol

Saw that and thought I'd share x]

BTW Mia! Friday is supposed to be Mi-ffany day! Let's figure out what to do yeah? OH! and tell me if you want those books renewed m'dear :]

1:30AM Making French Fries

Saw this on my friend's tumblr and thought it was cute x] I'll update some other time.

"Like me? I don't have any best friends"
":[ But you're on my best friends list"
"No no no. I don't want to say you're my best friend because I lost all my best friends, why would I wan't to lose you?"
":'] Then we will stop saying best friends! You're now my.. myyyy.. my 'human encyclopedia'"
BAHAHA ♥

I Forgots!

I'm still here,
if your heart breaks
if your troubles stay
when things go down.
I'm still here,
when you're all alone
in home
and you're feeling afraid.
I'm still here, I'm still here.

I found that when I was cleaning out my stuff this past week and forgot that I wanted to post it here. I found a lot of other things that I wrote just like that and DAMN! I used to be so good with songs and poetry and little saying. WHATHAPPENED?!

I'm still here,
days and days pass by
whenever you need me.
I'm still here,
when graduation comes
when we move along
wherever you go
I'm still here.
Oooh I'm still here.

Hey Mia! One guess to who I wrote that about! xD The verses I wrote on this I find are ridiculous and not worth posting. They're just examples that I needed a larger vocabulary lol!

:]

Facebook doesn't know what I'm doing in school. Yesterday it said I was studying mechanical technology and today it says I'm studying English literature. Confusing much? I'm doing both actually xD I'm quite happy with myself for figuring out what I want to do. I have this nagging feeling at the back of my head thats scared of what my dad is gonna say when he gets back from the Philippines, but I figured I should have the right to choose what I want to do and not let anything/anyone hold me back! Quite a burst of confidence has been surging through me lately :D Thanks Mia! You made me feel better somehow, like after I read the fanfic I was so giddy and then watching Les Miserables reminded me of how I loved working backstage and seeing all the behind the scenes stuff :'] Then that burst of accomplishment burst within me like I know it's the right thing to do. I mean you hear about that kind of feeling in books but omgosh! It feels amazing! Then yesterday I kind of got glum about it because my classes are so spread out between different classes and I know I'm gonna hear a mouthful about that but now I really don't care :D WEEEE!!

Obviously there's not much going on in life right now lol other than my epiphanies :D

Monday I'm gonna help ms eaton move her stuff and see Mia and Amanda :D Then deal with CSN because their registration system hates me and theennnn go to UMC cause my knee is popping. Lately I've been wearing my brace a bit too much meaning I gotta get it checked! OH NOES!

Okay no more dramatics sorry xD I'll leave you with a song I just learned on the guitar. It's adorable :]

BTW Mia, Boston is from that first scene where jace is playing the piano. In case you didn't see my comment x]

Just To Get Away

This song was a part of the playlist for the fanfic I was reading. It's perfect for the moment :']

Wiiindyyy

It's so nice out today! Just the wind kills it a little cause of allergies -_- I couldn't breathe when I went to sleep this morning. Yes, this morning. Mia's fanfic got me up all night because all of a sudden the chapters were ending in cliff hangers and I couldn't NOT find out what happened next x]

I'm so "UGH" today, like I've had enough but I'm not quite sure what I've had enough of. Maybe my brothers' attitudes are starting to piss me off since I'm stuck with them all the time now. I dunno. As weird as it sounds I've been thinking about my neighbor lately. I'm not quite sure why because we never talk, only hellos at little barbecues and such and he's 2 or 3 years younger than me so I can't think about him in THAT way. I dunno. Yeah when I'm older 2/3 years won't seem like much but at the moment nyeh.

You know in some books where the girl meets this guy who is mysterious because he's doing whatever he wants without anyone knowing about it? He's so spontaneous and he's okay with being by himself or doesn't care that everyone calls him names because he's different, he's hot nonetheless because he has that mystery about him and he's so free-spirited and caring but nobody takes the time to know that. Then they fall in love because the girl is different from other girls and she relieves him of any pain he has and he lets her in on his little secrets that she's okay with, even if they're bad. I don't want to be that girl. I don't want to have some ordinary life, waiting for someone to show up and surprise me with their care. I want to be the guy. To be free-spirited, not care about other teens who are stupid because of how immature they are, and meet that special person that will make me feel better. I won't be waiting for "prince charming", just live my life however I want and stumble upon him one day. No expectations. No depressing wait for "the one". Just live and let it happen, whenever it's meant to be.

Ramble, ramble, ramble. Sorry I've been thinking a lot.



Toodles ♥